Perspective from the CGH Lab

I initially thought I’d write a blog post about the start of my 3rd trimester and the pregnancy complications I am once again facing. I thought it would be informative and beneficial to other women out there. But as I sat in the lab this morning, awaiting another blood draw, and feeling slightly sorry for myself…an elderly couple sitting across from me caught my eye. They were in their early 80’s and I suspect that they have been together since they were children. The sweet old man appeared to be experiencing some type of medical problem and his wife was so kind and gentle with him. She accompanied him to the room while he had his blood drawn and once they were finished, she helped him with his coat. As they walked away, she gently patted his back in the way only a woman knows how to. Tears swelled in my eyes which in return helped put things in perspective for me. She demonstrated pure compassion and love, although she is likely suffering on the inside too. I don’t know their story, but I can tell that it is beautiful.

I think that we can get so wrapped up in our own lives, our own worlds, that we fail to truly see others. We also get lost in the things that aren’t going right that we fail to see the beautiful gifts we already have. My mom sent me a text message today that said, “Don’t forget how blessed you are”. And she is right. I could let myself fall into anger and frustration or question why my body responds to pregnancy the way it does. I could plead a case of, “I’ve done everything right this time and still, here you find me”. But that kind of mindset won’t change the situation. And at the end of the day, I know I tried. I had this overwhelming feeling of appreciation for the blessings I do have. Hunter has been wrapping his arms around my neck, holding me tight, and saying “mommy, mommy, mommy” over and over. It fills my soul in a way nothing else ever has. I have a husband who goes to every appointment with me and visits me at the lab where I have to wait for 3 ½ hours.

I have a mom and grandma who c o m p l e t e me.

I am blessed.

I can’t help but think that there are probably so many women right now who are trying to conceive and have been unsuccessful in doing so. I imagine their days are filled with sadness, but I pray that they still have hope, whether that means becoming a mother in the traditional form or in another way, still equally as beautiful. I imagine that the pregnancy announcements on Facebook, belly bump pictures, and even posts such as this, cause a twinge of heartache in their core. I feel for you and I am here for you.

You never know what someone is going through. I couldn’t help but sit in the lab today and wonder about everyone's stories. Were they there for routine blood work or for something more serious? How would their results affect their life? We all sat quietly minding our own business, but I know that each of us had so much on our minds.

I'm ending this day with appreciation and gratitude. Sure, I'll probably wipe a few more tears from my eyes, and spend a few more minutes worrying about things that are out of my control. But, all of that seems so insignificant when you think about what other people are facing. Here's to finger pricks, because baby girl...you're so worth it.

Xoxo,

Jordan